Darwin Was Right

Once upon a time, internet challenges didn't exist. Each idiot did things within his small circle, and the damages were generally reduced to one or two intellectually challenged individuals in the same neighborhood. Now, however, whether benign or species-threatening, strange behaviors are being practiced wherever internet reaches, which is pretty much everywhere.

Most of us remember the Blue Whale challenge, which consisted of following certain steps, which would end in suicide. The Momo challenge was something similar. The teenager that will maim themselves and then take their own life, just to win a challenge is one that needs help. These challenges, and their existence, should have had parents taking a better look at their offspring. In some cases, it did. Others were lost.

Those were a couple of the darker "challenges." The lightest one was the ice bucket challenge. It originated in summer, and was for a worthy cause; raising money for ALS investigation. Everyone was doing it, from celebrities to nobodies. Of course, there were a few that got out of hand. A woman died when an entire trash can of ice and water fell on her head. Someone tried it with an excavator raining liquid cold on him. Not a good idea. Still, it was generally fun.

Then, someone got the idea of another challenge. Thankfully, it didn't go far. I suppose a luminary must have thought that if ice can burn, and we can withstand it for a few seconds, how about pouring boiling water on oneself? How bad can the burn get? Well, about third-degree and skin graft bad in the best of cases. In the worst, Darwin's theory of natural selection gets vindicated.

Another challenge that would have had the Portuguese and Dutch who fought for Sri Lanka tearing their hair out at the sheer waste, was the one in which a person had to swallow an entire teaspoon of cinnamon in sixty seconds without drinking. Videos of kitchens covered in a cloud of cinnamon, as people choked on the dry powder, went viral. I assume none of those who tried to end up choking on the powder had asthma. If they did, they would have known that losing the ability to breathe in enough life-giving oxygen is not fun. 

Then there was the Tide pod challenge. This consisted in eating and chewing pods of Tide detergent, or any other detergent. Now, the exact reason for eating and swallowing a poisonous substance that could permanently burn your mouth and esophagus, and possibly kill you, is quite beyond the reach of my imagination. Proctor and Gamble, the makers of Tide, had to come out and specify that Tide pods are meant only for washing clothes, nothing else. I think they should change the warning on their label, from "Keep away from children," to "Keep away from children and morons."

Then there was another nifty one, which consisted of using a moving vehicle in a dance move. The person would dance with the car door open and the car in motion. Of course, this was to copy a music video. A controlled music video. At first, it was a matter of the driver filming the passenger hopping out of the slowly moving car and dancing alongside it. Then, an intellectually challenged person decided to hop out of the driver's seat and have the passenger (or a fixed camera) film them dancing. Those with the lowest thinking capacity did such a stunt on a slightly sloping street. Or on a two-way street. Imagine the possible results.

The latest viral challenge involves a movie (Bird Box) in which the characters have to go around blindfolded so as not to see an invisible entity that would make them suicidal. So, of course, it had to be copied, only this time, those that put on the blindfolds are the suicidal ones. People have been putting on blindfolds and moving around the house, banging into things. Some have been going outside and moving around, banging into things. I am awaiting the first notice of someone being run over by traffic doing this, or otherwise being maimed or killed. What I have seen is the first traffic accident doing the Bird Box challenge. A 17 year old in Utah pulled a beanie over her eyes as she was driving. Luckily, all the people involved are okay; not so much the cars. It's another instance of natural selection at its finest.

Our brains have a function that is called critical thinking. This function allows us to consider actions which might be dangerous and avoid them. Unfortunately, not all seem to have inherited this trait. Therein lies the greatest danger to our species.

Charles Robert Darwin, Scientists
 

 

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