Beginning Over, 1. It's a Cycle.

I have reverted to pre-pandemic times, and abandoned my writing for a bit. I simply feel tired and withdrawn. With the new season, I have hibernated into myself, simply accepting the darkness and the death of the year. I am also weary of the world. We have stopped watching the nightly news, partly because the television reception is so bad, partly because we catch the headlines on various online newspapers. Even so, I can't stand the hypocritical politics that have taken over the national and international scene. Democracy is dying and too few people care about defending it. We are reliving history and don't seem to give a damn as long as we can get the newest gadgets and toys.

The pandemic is returning because people don't care and think everything is over. Masks are mandatory everywhere inside, but not outside. Outside, they are recommended if distances of a meter and a half can't be kept. But people obviate the "recommended" part, and just see the "not obligatory" rule. People are also hungry for celebrations and get-togethers, since last year they weren't possible, so they get together without precautions. Then, we have the city of Vigo, whose mayor lit the Christmas lights with all the fanfare of yesteryear, boasting that the display was bigger and better than that of Madrid and even of New York. That has concentrated thousands of people daily in the center of Vigo, causing contagion to skyrocket. 

And, despite most of the population being vaccinated, there are still holdouts. We know one person who is scared of the possible bad reactions from the vaccine. Yet, that person is hypertensive and does not keep a low-sodium diet, nor do they take their medication. They are worried about a possible reaction that very likely won't happen to them, but not about the probable stroke or heart attack they are willing on themselves.

These things cause me to fill with a silent despair, observing the inherent stupidity in so many people. I once believed that, if you explained everything perfectly to someone who disagreed on fundamental things with you, such as equality of the sexes, the need to pay taxes to have a decent social safety net, etc, that they would end up understanding the reasons and coming around to your point of view. 

That's not what happens. What happens is that they become even more entrenched in their belief that you are a communist liberal and not to be taken seriously. Or, in Spain, a Marxist Bolivarian (no, I don't know, either). There comes a point in which, when politics come up in a simple conversation, that you simply nod or change the subject. So many, many people don't want to think, that I sometimes wonder what they have a brain for. These people will believe only catchphrases, simple jingles that are spewed out to capture acolytes and not explain anything. They are much more interested in the gossip about famous people, or the newest phone, or stupid internet videos that aren't even funny, but are of highly questionable taste. 

I have turned to walking through the woods, observing nature, learning to not hate the growing darkness and cold, but to embrace it as simply another part of the cycle of life. It's difficult not to hate the darkening evenings, and the lack of early light. It's also difficult not to hate days like we've had this week, when the lowering clouds and the driving rain make everything feel damp and miserable. But, accepting them as part of nature helps keep up the spirits in the wait for spring. 

Life is composed of cycles. Now, we are in the darkness, but will soon turn to the light. Humanity is going back down into darkness, but will one day turn back to the light. Whether or not I will live to see the upturn is questionable, but it will come, as it has come in the past. And with each upturn to the light, humanity comes a little further along toward a more egalitarian society. Some day it will be a possibility lying at the tips of our fingers. The sad part is that we have to go through the darkness to reach it.

Life continues.