The Clerk is Always Right

When we were married my husband and I travelled to Boston because I wanted to show him where I had grown up. He loved it all (except the food, but that's another story), especially the politeness of the people. He was amazed that wherever we went, people would smile, say "Hello!" or "Thank you!" and look like they really meant it. He wasn't accustomed to that. 

Because if you go to an office, a bank, a store, etc., where someone will wait on you, friendliness is the last thing you notice. Yes, they'll smile, say "Hello" and possibly "Thank you" but they'll mostly look like they're waiting for the fly to leave. Especially in banks. There has been a revolution in banking due to the crisis, and banks have swallowed other banks and almost all cooperative banks (that didn't charge for everything) have disappeared into the whale's belly of large, impersonal banks that only look at the bottom line. So, if there used to be two or three different branch banks in a town, possibly one or two were closed after the merger. And all the clients are now squeezed into one or two offices with the same amount of staff or less. Going to the bank now is an all-morning job, because they haven't deigned to open to the public in the afternoon, either. So when you take your number, discover it's 59 and they're still serving 21, you can go do your shopping or pull out a book. Not surprisingly, a bank is where you're going to get the least smiles and politeness. And God help you if you have a problem that needs ironing out! They won't be outright rude, but, if you're not used to it, it will seem that way.

Another place where politeness is thrown out with the bath water is hospitals and clinics. More than anything because of the wait involved. In our GP clinic I chose an afternoon doctor. (There's a choice of having a doctor that consults mornings or afternoons.) My doctor begins to consult at three o'clock. I always try for that slot. I know I will be seen almost as soon as she comes in and I will be in and out. If I get a time such as six o'clock I know I can take a book with me that I have just begun to read. That's because the doctors have appointments every five minutes. There are consultations which can finish in five minutes or under, but not all of them. And there are emergencies that can come in halfway through the afternoon. And if one of those emergencies has to be sent in an ambulance to the hospital, the doctor has to go with it, while her appointments wait. There are few smiles in the clinic. 

Department stores are a mix. If the clerk who attends you has had to be interrupted while in a conversation with another clerk, you'll barely be acknowledged. Just a short uplift of the corner of the mouth and a fast "Gracias" as you're given your receipt. The same if the clerk is involved in any other chore. Where you'll be given more smiles and attention is at the counters where the expensive merchandise is sold. Of course, wealth is involved there. Small stores are another mix. Generally you'll be treated much more politely where the person who attends you is the owner. The employee can sometimes not care less, especially if the owner isn't on the premises. And you'll barely be noticed if they're talking with another customer who is also a friend. 

At restaurants waiters are generally aloof. Precise, but aloof. We're not a dining-out family, but normally there's simply strict politeness. We've never had an experience here like my husband and I had in a restaurant in Harvard Square. We must have found the friendliest waitress in the Boston area. As soon as she discovered where we were from, she started chatting with us and mentioned she was descended from Portuguese immigrants. She helped us choose lunch and brought it with panache, proud of what she was serving (it was good, too). After her turn was finished, she came and sat with us for a couple of minutes before saying good-bye. Don't expect that from a waiter here unless you know him or her intimately. Even at bars and cafés, if you're not a regular, the bartender will not generally strike up a conversation. Unless it's the owner of a bar in a neighboring parish. Thank God he passed the management on to his daughter, because he would have lost enough of his customers to be forced to close. He had his regulars who would come in every evening. The owner had his favorites, though, and has even joined gossip against one of the customers that had always spent the most in his bar. And whenever a vacationing couple from Valladolid would drop by for a small drink, the owner would go overboard to please them. They weren't friends, they just happened to stop by one year and then returned every summer. The owner would give them free meals, even go out fishing for them one time, and ignore the regulars as soon as the couple came into the establishment. Not very bright to not see which side his bread was buttered on. 

There was once a clerk in Santiago de Compostela who must be retired by now. The store is still there, but he's not. I once needed something from a stationer's and on a rainy day in Santiago I stopped by a store that looked promising. I folded my umbrella and went in. Before I could open my mouth the clerk said, "Put your umbrella in the stand by the door." I leaned over and did so. Sour feeling appears. Two steps to the door, stone floor, grating tone of voice. I asked for what I was looking for. The answer was negative, he didn't carry it. No offer of referral to another store, no offer of ordering it. Fine. Without another word I took my umbrella and left. And have never been back. A little politeness will catch a lot of customers. An acid tongue will lose them.