I Am Who I Am

A student of mine who goes to our local high school, told me in conversation class that all the girls of his year (13 year olds) received a small box with some free sanitary pads and a coupon for their next purchase. Up to here, okay, yes, it's publicity among young people to try to capture their fidelity to a certain product that is of a necessary consumption. Still, free samples of something you need and use every month are always welcome. The problem appeared with what the boys received.

They got a leaflet explaining that a few days every month the girls got their period, and that that might make them feel cranky, sensitive, and moody. The boys' obligation was to show them extra care and consideration, and treat them well, understanding that they needed to be pampered during those days.

Excuse me? 

Yes, the calendar still says we're in 2018. That sounds like something my classmates would have been told in 1982. Do not patronize me just because I have my period. It is a biological function which we know how to deal with, and how not to let it affect the rest of our life. Deal with me as a person, not as a weakling that bleeds once a month. Whoever wrote that was a person whose mind is still anchored in rancid romance novels where the woman is rescued by a man who treats her like a china doll that might break. But it wasn't necessarily written by a man.

On the island of Mallorca, a 13 year-old girl went to school wearing a short-sleeved t-shirt that was just a little short and showed her bellybutton, and drawstring shorts that were not excessively short, just above the knees. She was called everything and a whore. But she wasn't criticized by boys or teachers, but by her fellow female classmates. They were the ones telling her she was showing too much of her body, and who took the time to write "little whore" on her chair. She called them out, and wrote a letter her father put on Facebook. She called her female classmates hypocrites who went hoarse shouting on Women's Day, and now indulge in machismo to criticize their classmate's clothing. She also said that they and their like are the principle problem most women have to overcome. 

The funny thing? Apparently it made enough of a stir to be mentioned once on a few news networks, and, according to an article, to be used by a Swiss school in lessons on respect. But, it's almost missing from the internet. I try different ways of calling it up on search engines, but I only get a couple of mentions, mostly videos, and that's it. It doesn't seem to be important, really. So, does it really matter that girls stab each other in the back? Nah, they're just doing everyone a favor that way, perpetuating stereotypes and ideas that keep them in their place, where they belong. That is the message I am receiving.

It's something we have to change, and that change won't come from the legislatures nor our male friends and acquaintances. That change comes from us. We have to stand together, prop each other up, encourage each woman to live as she chooses. As she chooses, not as society chooses for her. If her choice is to be a home body, then fine. But if she prefers to have an active life outside the house, there shouldn't be any kind of pressure sending her back home, not from society, and less from fellow women. 

And companies that pretend to be there for women, to help them become independent, even on those crappy days, would do better to stop patronizing them, and telling others to patronize them. The company is Arbora-Ausonia, subsidiary of Proctor & Gamble, and they make hygiene products under the brand names Ausonia and Evax-Tampax. This company has lost my money. I will not buy anymore from them. I am not a little girl to be coddled because I feel lousy once a month. I am a grown person who knows how to prioritize my day, and not let a biological function overcome me. I am who I decide to be, not who others tell me I should be. 

Emancipar, Liberación, Liberar, Libertad

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