Too Much Self
When I was a little girl in Catholic school back in Boston, I was taught that humility is a virtue. I was taught that I wasn't the important one; others were. That teaching conditioned me a lot. I never tried to showcase myself in a situation. Yes, I was selfish plenty of times, what kid isn't, especially an only child? But I tried to be aware of others.
I grew up loving beautiful images, and, when I was a teenager, I tried to capture them. My parents bought me a reflex camera and I started to train myself to see my surroundings properly. Since I was the one holding the camera, pictures of me from late adolescence onward are rare. Only on our day trips, or on special occasions, has my husband taken over my camera to take a photo of me. My current Facebook profile picture was one such moment.
When I wander around, I like to look at the places I visit, and take pictures to remember them accordingly. I know I was there; I have no reason to plaster my face into those pictures. I detest selfies. The selfie camera on my phone is the least used photographic accessory it has. Putting my face on the scenery is unnecessary. I know I was there. If I took the pictures, whoever is looking at them knows I was there. My mug is ugly. Why inflict it upon anyone?
I have never understood why anyone would want to wander around with a stick in their hand just to look at themselves on their phone and not at the world around them. Once, at the cathedral in Porto, I saw an extreme example. In one of the cloisters there is an area where the walls are covered in blue and white tiles, and each wall tells a story. All along the walls are stone benches where people once sat to contemplate eternity. Now, the tourists wander there, and most don't care a whit about the reason for the tiles. At least, not one woman who was sitting on one of the benches, phone secured at one end of the selfie stick. At the other end, she was posing, pressing the shutter, changing the pose, pressing the shutter. Smile enigmatically, tilt head, press shutter. Pout, change tilt, press shutter. Smile into the distance, turn the head, press shutter. It looked like she was on a one-person photo shooting session for Instagram.
But all these selfish selfies didn't just appear with social media. The habit has been made worse and encrusted into just about every aspect of our lives, now, but it's always been there. Years ago, a couple we knew accompanied us on one of our jaunts through Galicia. We went to the rugged northwest coast, the Costa da Morte, a beautiful and dangerous spot that used to be more solitary than it is now. As usual, I took my camera to take pictures of the area, and to remember the day.
The couple also took a camera, a small digital camera like the ones that were becoming all the rage. One of them would pose in a delightfully pretty spot, and the other would take the picture. Then, they would ask one of us to take the camera and to take photos of the two of them together. This was how they immortalized the place and the day; putting themselves in front of breathtaking scenery and making themselves the focal point. Because, of course, otherwise no one would know they had been to the place.
The selfie sticks and the selfie cameras are simply a symptom of one of the world's ills. Narcissism has always been with us. Of late, it has become alarming. Partly, the recognition of the worth of the individual is to blame. Yes, we are each of us important. But we are not so important that we are the center of the universe. While charity does start at home, it only begins there. If it's not expanded to include others, it's not charity; it's selfishness. The meaning of humility is not the erasure of the self, but the understanding that the self also exists in others.
So, put down that selfie stick and start looking at the world around you. There's more to see than just your face.
I grew up loving beautiful images, and, when I was a teenager, I tried to capture them. My parents bought me a reflex camera and I started to train myself to see my surroundings properly. Since I was the one holding the camera, pictures of me from late adolescence onward are rare. Only on our day trips, or on special occasions, has my husband taken over my camera to take a photo of me. My current Facebook profile picture was one such moment.
When I wander around, I like to look at the places I visit, and take pictures to remember them accordingly. I know I was there; I have no reason to plaster my face into those pictures. I detest selfies. The selfie camera on my phone is the least used photographic accessory it has. Putting my face on the scenery is unnecessary. I know I was there. If I took the pictures, whoever is looking at them knows I was there. My mug is ugly. Why inflict it upon anyone?
I have never understood why anyone would want to wander around with a stick in their hand just to look at themselves on their phone and not at the world around them. Once, at the cathedral in Porto, I saw an extreme example. In one of the cloisters there is an area where the walls are covered in blue and white tiles, and each wall tells a story. All along the walls are stone benches where people once sat to contemplate eternity. Now, the tourists wander there, and most don't care a whit about the reason for the tiles. At least, not one woman who was sitting on one of the benches, phone secured at one end of the selfie stick. At the other end, she was posing, pressing the shutter, changing the pose, pressing the shutter. Smile enigmatically, tilt head, press shutter. Pout, change tilt, press shutter. Smile into the distance, turn the head, press shutter. It looked like she was on a one-person photo shooting session for Instagram.
But all these selfish selfies didn't just appear with social media. The habit has been made worse and encrusted into just about every aspect of our lives, now, but it's always been there. Years ago, a couple we knew accompanied us on one of our jaunts through Galicia. We went to the rugged northwest coast, the Costa da Morte, a beautiful and dangerous spot that used to be more solitary than it is now. As usual, I took my camera to take pictures of the area, and to remember the day.
The couple also took a camera, a small digital camera like the ones that were becoming all the rage. One of them would pose in a delightfully pretty spot, and the other would take the picture. Then, they would ask one of us to take the camera and to take photos of the two of them together. This was how they immortalized the place and the day; putting themselves in front of breathtaking scenery and making themselves the focal point. Because, of course, otherwise no one would know they had been to the place.
The selfie sticks and the selfie cameras are simply a symptom of one of the world's ills. Narcissism has always been with us. Of late, it has become alarming. Partly, the recognition of the worth of the individual is to blame. Yes, we are each of us important. But we are not so important that we are the center of the universe. While charity does start at home, it only begins there. If it's not expanded to include others, it's not charity; it's selfishness. The meaning of humility is not the erasure of the self, but the understanding that the self also exists in others.
So, put down that selfie stick and start looking at the world around you. There's more to see than just your face.
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